As we get closer and closer to having two new babies around, I find myself crying more all the time. Not because I’m necessarily sad, mad, upset or even happy. Just, because I look and watch Collin and all the things that he does and says now, and I just wonder if I’ll really feel the same way about the twins as I do about him. Everyone says yes of course you will. And I guess I don’t really doubt that I will, but it’s just hard to sit and spend so much time with him the last two years and think that, not just one, but two, new babies are going to have space in my heart and my life like he does. As much as I’m ready for the twins to be here and not be pregnant anymore (I’m WAY beyond done being pregnant this time) I can’t help but think, these are the last days that I’m going to have just me and Collin.
He actually talks to me now and tells me what he wants and doesn't 
want. He interacts with Carly and the cats. He comforts me when I’m crying because I can’t believe our time is almost over. He gets excited to see me when I’ve been gone. He gets excited and recognizes things in books, on TV, and when we actually do get out. I watch him play and he’s using his imagination. He’s just one big ball of amazement to me and I just can’t seem to grasp the fact that “just us” is almost done. I’ve got two weeks at the most just us. And the worst part is, he doesn’t really understand what’s about to happen, and it is killing me.
Comforting me
Throwing his pall and playing catch
Enjoying some time in the sandbox
“Calling and talking” to Daddy
Sweet Daughter, Don't be sad. Collin will be fascinated by the babies and will want to hold them and help you. After all he does love to "hepy":-) And you know, the little ones will sleep a lot the first several months, so you have longer for you and Collin that you may think. Yes, you have a lifetime! You can take turns with Devin having special alone time with him. He will love going to MOSH to explore or the beach to pick up shells, the park to slide, or even tumbling for tots! And yes you will get a play fort for the back yard, and every day will be an adventure! You are a great Mom and will continue to be. God will help out along the way, just stay on your knees! And remember, family members may, at times, fight and bicker among themselves but will always stand together against the outside world. How well you know, only you can pick on your brother! You'll stomp on anyone else who tries to hurt him! So fear not little mama, you are already a much better mom than your mom!
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